I’m A Little Teacup (Apparently)

All my life, I have had what I now recognize as a prophetic gift. I would inexplicably know, hear or sense things. There weren’t many people I could openly talk to about any of it but it was there, showing up at various times in my life, over and over again. Sometimes, I’d blurt something out, other times, I’d just know. There were even times, I acted on what I knew and all would work out beautifully.

I don’t believe my gift is just for me, but I now see that it is not just for others either. I enjoy ministering prophetically, and I do so, not just in “appropriate”, church related areas and events, but wherever I am, whenever I feel I should. I feel compelled to do what God leads me to do, even if others don’t like it or agree. I just do, and I don’t apologize for that.

God gives us what we need as we are able to handle it. He is so good, He wouldn’t give us something good that we couldn’t handle, only to have it crush us. I got pretty good at ministering prophetically to others, it would get especially interesting and fun when I’d be paired with my oldest daughter. We have a sort of “Wonder Twin Power Activate!” kind of thing when paired together. We often see parts of the exact same message God has for people we minister to, and have been known to give really nice, more full pictures of things for people. It’s nice.

After some years of ministering to others, a group of friends and I began to focus on hearing God for ourselves more. We all agreed that hearing for others felt better, more accurate. When hearing something for ourselves, it got tricky. So many questions come to mind. Am I making it up? Is this me just telling myself what I want to hear, or is this really God? Lord, can you give me confirmation through something or someone else? Am I hearing you right? Can I trust that I am hearing from you, but for me this time?

I (low key) enjoy challenges, so along with my friends, I began a journey of getting to a point where I am more confident in hearing God for myself. I’m still on this journey and others, of course, but I am definitely not where I was and I believe it was all a massive set up, by God.

He began to tell me things for and about myself. He’d then confirm them in many ways, oftentimes, before I would think to ask for any confirmation. Without going into a long story, He has walked me through some unimaginable stuff, telling me exactly how to do it- and it didn’t always make even a little bit of natural sense- but it has been nothing short of glorious. The faith that I have in Him has grown exponentially. I’m pretty buff in the spirit, hahaha! With Him and because of Him, I am able to walk pathways not many can walk, and I am able to do it with my joy, peace and strength in tact. Perhaps these are stories I will tell someday. For now, let’s just say, I am one who looks nothing like all I’ve been through. When some hear my stories, they are shocked because again, you’d never know if I didn’t say anything. That’s how gracious God is though.

As long as I live, I will do what He wants me to do and say what He wants me to say to others. Right now, I’m just grateful that it isn’t just for others. It’s for me too.

I’ll end with a vision God showed me a few days ago. I eagerly sent a message to my Gary about it the next morning. He interprets dreams and visions… Here’s what I wrote:

“Good morning beloved Dad! I had a vision as I went to bed last night. I saw a white teacup. It was tilted over to pour and what was pouring out was crystal clear rivers of waters. It was an impossible amount pouring out of this small teacup, but it poured continuously and vigorously. Basically, a river pouring from a little white teacup, hahaha!”

Lol, I can still see the teacup. That water was not slowing or stopping. It was gushing forth with no end in sight.

Do you know what my dad said? His reply was simple. He said, “The teacup is you.” How sweet is God?!

The God Cheat

There have been so many times I thought to write. There have been many things I thought to write about, but each time, I just didn’t. I have had so many different things on my mind. I have several new things I am already doing and a few others that want to get into, so, as usual, I’m all over the place.

I pray all is well with you and yours during this time. For many, it is fraught with fear, uncertainty, sadness and more. I pray often for us all, and especially those having a tough time as we wait out this pandemic.

I never want to appear callous or as if I take grave things lightly, especially when others around me are clearly suffering. I am sensitive to that as I have been told throughout my life that I didn’t take things seriously because I wasn’t perceived to be worried enough.

The fact is, I trust God. That doesn’t mean I don’t have bouts of fear and He doesn’t have to pull me back into sanity, but as I heard a doctor say on a video, (paraphrasing) “If I can’t trust God to protect me from this virus, how can I say I trust Him for salvation and an eternity with Him in Heaven?”

In the beginning of this, I remember a moment where I felt fear creeping in. It was because of false information being circulated. Thankfully, God set me straight and showed me where I was to get my information. Ever since then, I have felt hope and peace and even joy in the midst of it all.

In this moment, I sat to write because I suddenly turned my attention to Abba and said, “Are you serious? Am I really sitting here happy and making plans and enjoying this time? It seems like I am cheating. It seems kind of wrong.” I am enjoying time with my husband and our 5 children. I am planning and delving into new things and old things that I used to enjoy, like rollerskating. Numerous blessings have come about because of and in spite of all that is going on. Things just look, hopeful and bright. I won’t apologize for this, and I refuse to allow anything or anyone rob me of this.

A former pastor of mine used to say peace isn’t the absence of conflict. You know you have peace when all hell is breaking loose around you and you’re good. I am using wisdom when I have to go out, but I am grateful that I am not afraid. I see this as an opportunity to grow deeper in intimacy and trust in God. I remember when I felt that first bout of fear coming on, I asked God to help me to trust Him because I didn’t really know how. The really cool thing is, even with Him saying we are to trust Him, He is the one who helps us to do it. He does it all. I pray you are well.

An Unconscionable Love

All five of my children have gone to the library, which has afforded me a very rare moment to be (physically) alone.  Naturally, I immediately set out to cleaning and straightening a few things, and, talking to God.  These days, I sometimes don’t feel able to do much more than ask Him to help me.  I need help loving people when they are at their worst.  I need help in being gracious when I want to go completely ballistic, telling people off in a manner that I feel they are so deserving. I need help in having compassion for those who are oblivious to their need to change destructive behaviors and patterns.  I need help minding my life, attitudes, behaviors, thoughts and business, instead of concerning myself with that of others around me.  My stuff is a lot, all on it’s own.

All this led me to consider Jesus.  Seriously, how did Jesus do this?  How could he look with love and compassion, blessing and healing those who would later scream, “Crucify him!!!”  How did he do that?  How could he smile, eat, drink, laugh and hang out with people who were utterly selfish, self serving, cruel, rude and more?  How could he hand over the money bag to a man that he knew would steal from them all and eventually, literally sell him out?  How could he not look at Judas, in this case, and not punch him square in the face?  My God! How did Jesus do all this?!

I sit here and consider myself and others, and how when we are betrayed or hurt, we feel as if we are the only ones who have these feelings.  We feel justified and sometimes go to great lengths to ensure that justice is served in one way or another.  We hope they pay for what they did to us, all the while, we are blind to our own offenses against others and God.

We want to see everyone “pay the piper”, except us, of course.  We want that ‘get out of jail free’ card. When it comes to us, we want mercy and compassion.  The same mercy and compassion we deem others unfit to receive, from us, and God.  Lord help us.  My prayer is that we truly learn to love as Jesus loves.  To seek after the best for others, not just ourselves.  The Bible says that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.  We weren’t looking for him.  We didn’t want or choose him.  He chose and still chooses us.  Good and bad.  Ugly and pretty.  Nice and nasty.  We are immeasurably, irrevocably, and deeply loved.  Abba, help us to love as you do- with no limits or conditions.

Finding Joy In Trials

James 1:2-4 in the Message Bible reads, ​”Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.”

After getting a wonderful confirming dream from God, and listening to Bill Johnson speak on breakthrough, I am convinced that the Lord has saught to set me up for a serious promotion. The past several weeks have been very trying, so trying that, if I didn’t know the Lord, I sincerely don’t know where I would be or what I would be doing now. I have and am experiencing things that have literally changed the entire course of people’s lives, and just two months after giving birth, to boot.

The best part about the challenges I am facing is that God is faithful, ever present and fully available, especially when I turn to Him as so much seems to be going awry in my life.

I can take comfort, great comfort in knowing that not only is He not taken by surprise by any of what I am facing, but He has provided for me, from the beginning. 

All I need to do is trust and follow His leading. I can “count it all joy”, as I know that this set of challenges can help mature me in a way that will qualify me to receive far more from God than I ever imagined possible. 

God won’t give us more than we can handle. We tend to think of trials when considering this, but I understand it to include certain blessings as well.

 For instance, my 9 and 13 year olds can not ask and be permitted to borrow my car. It isn’t because I don’t want to share with them. They simply aren’t ready or mature enough for that type of blessing. It could literally kill them. 

My 18 year old, on the other hand, has gone to driving school and passed her driving exam. She has been driving for well over a year and is comfortable and good at it, so she can certainly get the keys to the car and go where she likes. She is mature enough and able to handle the responsibility. It is the same with us. I believe there is so much that God wants to bless us with, but we simply aren’t ready to receive it. We haven’t behaved in a manner that shows we are ready for the responsibility. 

Because God is a good father, He won’t give us anything, even a blessing that could harm us, even when He really wants to give it to us. I am thrilled to be loved like this and am now seeing the challenges I face, in a very different light.

Challenges are looking like enormous qualifiers to me these days. It is when all the “chips are down”, when we’re “backed against the wall” that what is really in us, comes out. Do we really trust that God is with us? Do we realize how surrounded we are by hosts of angels and options? Do we know how deeply we are loved and provided for? Do we believe we have been provided for even when what we see before us says the exact opposite?

I’m using this moment of challenge as an opportunity, a gift that will enable me to come up higher and be better off for having gone through it. I am choosing to praise, give, love, and bless my way through it. 

I will look back on the prophetic worda I have received over the last few years, and allow a sense of hope to grow and flourish even in the midst of what looks desolate and destroyed.

I will light up the area I inhabit with my heavenly language and praise to God, because He is surely with me during this most holy of set ups. 

I will walk, run, leap and dance joyfully with my Abba as I pass this “test” with flying colors, for He is surely with me, loving me, whispering messages of love and hope to me in my sleep and while I am awake.

I will keep looking to the One who is the Author and Finisher of my faith. 

I challenge you to do the same. When trying times are upon you, count it all joy. See it as an opportunity for growth and development. See it as an opportunity to qualify for something your Heavenly Father is just itching to give you. Worship Him. Praise Him. Thank Him for your breakthrough when it looks like none is forthcoming. Allow hope to rise up in you and rejoice. Look at and make personal, the promises in His Word. Look at prophetic words you have received and perhaps put aside. If you dont have any, but would like one, please write me and allow me to speak a word from the Lord over you, but whatever you do, don’t allow challenges to stress you out and keep you down. You were meant for more, so much more. God has so much in store for you. Will you set yourself in position to receive from Him today?

Who Do YOU Think You Are?

Romans 6 is filled with how God sees you as a believer.  It says you are dead to sin, and alive in Christ. You are joined with Christ in baptism. You can live new a life. Death has no power over you. You live under the freedom of God’s grace. Romans 7 says you are no longer bound by the law, struggling with sin. Romans 8 calls you more than conquerors. Other verses call you a royal priesthood, the very son or daughter of God almighty. You are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus.  You are deeply loved and on and on and on.

As one who encourages and ministers to others regularly, I don’t find it particularly hard to see the gold in others.  God has enabled me to see others as he sees them and be able to help them to see it too. As easy as it is to encourage and uplift others, I am finding that, in some ways, I have neglected to see myself in a proper light.  I noticed a few days ago that on several occasions I have said something about myself that simply is no longer true of my character.

I grew up in a single parent household, my mom’s only child.  As such, when kids tried to back me up against the wall and bully me, I came out fighting, and fighting hard.  I was always known as nice and sweet but I was also eventually known as one to not mess with as word of my completely out of control behavior spread.  It took a long while for me to get angry, but once I was, it would be as if I was taken over by someone completely different and completely unpredictable.  I am no longer that person.  I have not behaved in that way in over 23 years, yet I find that I still feel as if I am not far from that unpredictable, uncontrollable person at times and recently, I have referred to myself as that person.

Thank God for revelation!  I feel that He is patiently making His rounds throughout various areas in my life where a complete overhaul is needed in my mind and I am so grateful for it. The thing is, because, in those moments in my past, I seemed to be capable of things I never thought possible, getting angry like that today is kind of scary to consider. Here’s the thing though… God has helped me to develop a level of patience that I must say, I don’t see in many at all.  Also, God has changed how I see, so things that once would have upset me fairly quickly, just don’t.  For most women, messing with their children is a big no-no.  A man was recently openly ogling my 13 year old daughter in a very lecherous manner.  This was something that could easily set me off instantaneously.  What happened floored me though.  Not only did I not get angry, but two things happened. First, I positioned myself so that the man saw and knew that I caught his nasty looks.  I simply stared at him unflinchingly. This made him super uncomfortable.  Then I told him that yes, I saw him and from that moment, until he left, he seemed to be unable to stop himself from looking back at me and my gaze never left him until he was gone.  I effectively protected my child without acting like a fool in a public place.  The second thing caught me off guard.  I actually felt a sense of compassion for the guy.  Although I didn’t go and prophesy over him while there, (baby steps… gotta start somewhere, lol) I did feel for him and I began to see who God created him to be; a man of purity and righteousness.  God has changed my mind and how I respond to the unlovely things of this world.

This makes me realize more than ever that if He sees me as good, why don’t I?  Why am I still holding myself to past behaviors, mistakes and mindsets when He has obviously done so much mind renewal in my life?  I am now making a concerted effort to agree with my Abba about who I am.  What about you?  How do you see yourself?  Does it conflict with what God says about you?  Who will you choose to believe?

 

Taking God At His Word

With each passing day, I am closer and closer to giving birth, and for once in my (pregnant) life, I don’t feel ready.  You’d be hard pressed to find another pregnant woman past 36 weeks, pregnant with multiples no less, who isn’t eager for the all infamous “Labor/Birth Day” to arrive but of course, as always, I have to be different.

I wanted to go at least to 38 weeks with this pregnancy and I just feel strongly that it’s not going to pan out that way, not to mention I asked the Lord and felt the answer was, no, I would not go to 38 weeks with this pregnancy.  The thing is, I tend to go before 40 weeks anyway, so it isn’t unusual, I just want to give these little ones every chance to be ready for life outside the womb as possible.  I know all too well how precious every additional day in the womb is for a baby, let alone two or more.

Part of the reason I am not ready emotionally, is my family here in Jersey and New York.  I don’t like the idea of missing various events and gatherings and actually cry when I think of missing them.  I am very much a stickler about my post partum period, staying in bed for the first 40 days and only venturing out when I am absolutely comfortable. With the prospect of two babies, I don’t imagine I’ll be in a hurry to rush out the door and that bothers me.  I have exaggerated, saying I’ll be back in the swing of things after 2-3 years and then cried a little feeling that wouldn’t be too far from the truth.

I also feel very strongly that missing my family isn’t the only reason I am not ready emotionally at this moment.  Perhaps additional reasons have to do with the journey that got me to this point.  Maybe it’s things I’m not so ready to deal with or explore just yet, I don’t know.  What I do know, or Who I do know though, is God.

If God is saying I may give birth sometime next week, not only will my babies be ready, but so will I.  He has told me over and over that I can do this and I believe Him.  I do not and never did fear the labor and birth, which is something I am grateful to not need to work through.  I know that a great deal of the people I miss would have absolutely no problem coming to visit me when I am ready to receive visitors and, I will likely be able to see others during our prophetic retreat in April.

Even though I don’t feel ready now, I can trust God now that all is well and I don’t need to worry about not being ready.  This is an opportunity to rest in Him, to go to Him and talk it out and just bask in His presence and I’m taking it.

I’m setting myself to simply enjoy the rest of this pregnancy and just be in the moment. I will not allow the possibility of my not being ready next week (which isn’t even here yet) dictate how I feel and trust God today.  That’s silly.  What’s exciting to consider, is that God is already in my next week now, so if He says I’m good, I’ll take His word to heart and believe it.

How Much Are You Willing To Allow?

Several verses in the Bible include this phrase about Jesus that say, “And he healed them all” or “And he healed them” (See Matt 12:15, Matt 15:30, Luke 6:19).

Then you have instances where Jesus walked on water, walked through walls, got money from the mouth of a fish, fed multitudes with a minuscule amount of food, and turned water into wine.

Of course, we can’t forget how he also cast out demons and raised the dead.  As if all this wasn’t amazing enough, he said in John 14:12-14, “I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done, and even greater works, because I am going to be with the Father. 13. You can ask for anything in my name and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father. 14. Yes! Ask me for anything in my name and I will do it!”

Unfortunately in too much of the Body of Christ, this is glazed over or altogether ignored, but look at what Jesus said. He said “anyone who believes in me…”  This is where each of us has to make a decision.  We either believe or we don’t, and, if we do believe, we have an entire world of the supernatural to experience and release on anyone in our path.

One thing God is working on with me these days has to do with how much I am willing to allow to go on in my life and body.  Carrying twins or more is seriously no joke.  While it’s true that every pregnancy is different, carrying multiples is in a class all it’s own and in my experience, is in no way comparable to carrying a singleton.  I am experiencing discomforts and pain that I never imagined possible and the weightiness is nothing short of astounding.

There are times where I am on the brink of tears or full blown ugly crying and the Lord will tap my shoulder and ask me what I am looking at.  In those moments, I realize I am focused on my problem, thus magnifying and empowering it, instead of speaking to it and telling it what to do.

In addition to pain, I am finding myself rejecting a lot of comments people make regarding my experience now or in the near future.  For instance, I mentioned being tired and someone said that I’d better get as much sleep as possible now because soon I won’t be able to.  Here’s the thing, Psalm 4:8 says, I will lie down and sleep in peace for you alone O Lord make me dwell in safety.  That’s my portion, not sleepless days and nights.

I didn’t think to do it with my first two children, but with my third and fourth, I spoke to them in the womb and told them how things would be for us.  I told them that night time was for sleeping and that we would all sleep well at night and that’s precisely what happened.  They’d wake up to nurse, I’d change them if necessary and right away, we’d be back off to sleep no problem.  I didn’t have any nights of sitting up with them, feeling like a zombie and I refuse to plan on that happening just because it’s “normal or expected”.  No, thank you, not when my Abba says I can have otherwise.  I am set to always expect, believe for and declare the absolute best over my life and that of others just because I am a daughter of the King of Kings.

My suggestion to you is to take a look at what you may be allowing in your life.  Does it align with what the world says is natural or God’s Word?  Which do you prefer, to live the world’s way or God’s?  My prayer is that we all come into full revelation of what we have and can do in Christ and operate out of that.  Let’s incite the world to jealousy!  Let’s show them what living a life with Christ can do in one’s life.

Do You Know Him?

Lately, the thing foremost in my mind has been the area of being in relationship with the Lord.

Many believers, if asked, will proclaim emphatically that they love the Lord and have a relationship with Him.  They may even add some catch phrase about being too blessed to be stressed or how able God is to do this or that but not only do they not necessarily believe it, all too often, these same believers are just as stressed and uncertain about life than one who admits they don’t know God.  These are Christians who say on one hand that they love and know the Father but  will also admit to not knowing if He still speaks at all, let alone whether or not He speaks to them.

With anyone else, we would never say we are close and have an intimate relationship with someone we spend virtually no time with.  That would be very strange.  People do this with God all the time though and think nothing of it. We get that to be in relationship with other human beings, certain factors must be in place but somewhere along the lines, when it comes to God, most think church attendance and reading the Bible in a year equate to a relationship.

I feel strongly that there are people who are truly hungry for something real with the Lord.  People who are tired of dealing with things they don’t have to.  They see verses that say things like, “Be anxious for nothing”, but have no idea how to actually be anxious for nothing.  They see that Jesus said to take his yoke and burden because his is easy and light but they just don’t know how to let go of their own and take his.  Or perhaps, they have come in contact with someone who has attained something with the Lord that they want.  Perhaps it is seeing the relationship others have with Him that makes them say, “I want that!”  I have been asking the Lord how I can help.

I see so many Christians, wandering about life as if they are orphans, being swayed and tossed by whatever comes their way in life and it breaks my heart.  I can only imagine how God feels.  He never wanted this for His children.  If He said He has not given us a spirit of fear, you’d best believe, He hasn’t.

There’s nothing like a real bonafide relationship with the Creator of the universe.  In the beginning, it takes some discipline to remember to acknowledge that He is ever present, always waiting to speak with us as if we are the only person alive, but the outcome of it all is nothing short of astounding. I love how I can be going on about my day and God interjects what I’m doing and speaks to me.  I love how, when I start to drift away, focusing on the newest pain this pregnancy presents me with, He whispers to me, “What are you looking at?”, and brings me back to Him.  I love how, I can go places and see people and He gives me messages for them when I was doing something completely different.  I love how, in the midst of seeing everyone around me in fear and even terror, He gives me a spot right on His lap and has me look at situations and see them as He sees them.  I love hearing His laughter and jokes about various situations that happen throughout my day.  I love how He has and is answering my prayer to become more real to me than anyone or anything I see or experience in front of me.

Because of all this and so much more, I trust Him. I truly trust Him and take Him at His word.  When I see promises in the Bible, I get super excited because I know it’s for me.

So, in asking the Lord how I can help, one idea came to mind that I am putting into practice right away.  I plan to do a one on one mentorship sort of thing over the next few weeks with one or two people.  Once I see how that goes, I will come back with what I have learned and have a more concrete idea on what I can do to help people in my sphere of influence to come to know the Lord in a more intimate way.

In the meantime, it is my prayer that if you have identified at all with not really having a relationship with Him, you won’t stay there and settle for that.  There’s so much more available for those of us who are in Christ.  Let’s get all that has been put here for us to attain.  He’s right there with you, eager to share so much with you, engage and enjoy Him.

Declare Something!

I’m not and have never been much into making resolutions for the new year.  I’d rather just do what I’m going to do and leave it at that.  I do enjoy making vision boards with my family, however, what I am majorly into these days is making declarations.  Maybe it’s the bossy girl in me but man, it feels so amazing to me to be able to speak things into existence like my Abba and watch it all unfold before my eyes.

He reminded me to make declarations a few weeks ago as I lie in bed in pain (normal pregnancy stuff).  He reminded me of who I am and how I don’t have to just bend or succumb to everything that comes my way.  I have the ability to change things. I can, with my words, make things happen that I want.

I hate that I feel the need to say this but I do not mean declaring things that aren’t right.  I won’t go declaring that someone else loses her husband so I can have him.  I don’t declare pain, or anything but love on someone who may have done something to hurt me at some point.  I mean to make declarations that are in line with God’s will and Word.  It’s quite easy to know the difference too.

With regards to my pregnancy for instance, I know as a birth worker, that there are things that kind of come with the territory, but, as a daughter of the King of Kings, I know that there are many things that don’t have to apply to or for me so I speak what I want.

Because I am only 4’10” tall, I have no where to grow but outward and boy, my back feels every bit of growth happening with these babies and it’s no fun at all at times.

One thing I declared was that although my frame is small, it is strong and continuously strengthened and perfectly able to handle carrying multiples.  When I see various unappealing symptoms that I could possibly contend with, I say no and declare the opposite over my body and babies. I always end up having a great time with this and I bring my family in on it too so that we can make declarations together.  It’s so much fun to hear what each of us comes up with and it’s great to record declarations so that we can go back to them and see what has happened as a result of those declarations.

So, instead of making resolutions, try making some declarations, and have fun with it.  Go big with it.  We have an amazing Father who is just waiting for us to declare a thing.  He is more than able, willing and ready to back us up and see to it that what we say comes to pass.  We have so much more authority than we realize.  Let’s make 2017 the year that we come into the full revelation of what we have and can do as children of the King.  And, before I forget, Happy New Year!

How Do You Go Through Trials?

I had one of those nights last night where I wake up around 2am and don’t go back to sleep for 3 or more hours.  Normally, I spend this time talking to God, Spirit to spirit so as not to wake my husband, although, sometimes I end up laughing about something the Lord and I are sharing.  We made some plans together for an event I’m planning.  He gave me some cool ideas on things that are kind of over my head, like centerpieces, lol and then the conversation shifted to mind renewal and mindsets.

He reminded me of my mentioning a plan to someone recently, and immediately the person interjected with an idea of something negative happening that would ruin the whole thing, lol.  Now, I remember, just before our first trip to Africa for a wedding, either me or my husband, I don’t recall which, mentioned it to someone and instead of them saying something like, “Wow!! You’re going to Zimbabwe for a wedding? What a wonderful experience!” the person said, “Are you sure you want to go to Africa?  What if they start the slave trade back up and you get captured?” The person went on to say what type of jobs my husband and I would get based on our complexions and all.  They had all the horrid details worked out.

A person who is dear to me is having a very serious procedure done which could very well be life threatening. Someone we know in common, who is a believer, mentioned how worried they are over the whole thing and that they have been pretty much expecting the worse in the situation.  Now, I’m not at all saying I have never done this before, I’d be lying if I did, but I just see things in such a different light these days that it is astonishing.

As believers, we know we are to put our faith and trust in God. We are to be anxious over nothing.  We know that worry is sin, and more.  Why is it though, that we find it so difficult to really trust God and give our burdens over to Him completely? Why do so many of us jump to negative conclusions and make up negative scenarios for our future or that of others when we really don’t want that for ourselves or others?

I remember the last straw for me.  It wasn’t a big deal situation.  I was simply going to have my car inspected in DC, and as I sat in my car, lined up, inching forward when appropriate, I started to get this horrible idea that my car would not pass inspection.  I had it all worked out, I’d fail inspection, have to do some repair that I had no money to pay for, it would be awful, I’d not be able to drive anymore because my car was faulty, etc.  You know what though?  There was absolutely nothing wrong or faulty with my car.  There was no logical reason that I would not pass inspection, and, of course, I passed, but before my turn came, I got angry and forced myself to snap out of what I called, “Stupid mode”.

Even after that, there were definitely times where I still automatically allowed the enemy to have me thinking negatively, but over time, it became less and less.  Now, I more easily pick up on it when I or others do it and it has become more foreign to me and I thank God for that.

Before my 3rd and closest sibling passed on my birthday almost 2 years ago, something dawned on me as I prayed with our other sister.  The enemy was attacking our family in so many ways during that time.  I remember suddenly, my sister and I laughed as we prayed because it dawned on us that our sister, a very strong believer, was being “threatened” with an eternity in Heaven.  Now, before I go on, I must say that this particular sister was both of our closest sister. Her going to Heaven at 40 years old, was no cakewalk for us.  It still isn’t, especially after our brother went the year before at 38 and our oldest sister went several years earlier at an even younger age.  Here’s the thing that dawned on us though, either way, our sister was good.  She’d either be healed here on Earth and have an amazing testimony to share personally, helping others and all, or, she’d go home and be with our Heavenly Father forever.  She’d go and wait for us and pray for us and root for us as we remain here.  There was no losing for her.  The enemy was truly threatening her with eternity with the Lord. Stupid. Philippians 1:21 says, For me, to live is Christ, to die is gain.  We believers win, regardless.  Living, we get to impact the world for God’s Kingdom and glory, to die is the best because we are eternally, physically reunited with our Heavenly Father and so many loved ones.  There is no loss!  The time spent here is so short, so minuscule when considering eternity, a fart in the wind as I always say, lol.

So here’s my position when trials come, “Praise God!! I can’t wait to see how He works this out for the good of all!”  He always does.  So many things that at the time, felt like the end, just wasn’t.  God always came through in bigger ways than I ever expected. His track record is proven and sure- the only sure thing in my life in fact!  I can trust Him with abandon and praise Him even when things are looking funky or shady.

My loved one who is having the procedure is in God’s capable hands.  Instead of moping and expecting the worst, I’m spending my time and energy just worshiping God for all that He is doing.  When bad thoughts come, I take the opportunity to prophesy the opposite.

When I learned that my husband didn’t get the position he went for which would have provided a major pay increase, smiles turned into excited giggles because I know my Abba, He is up to something!!  I can’t wait to see what He does with and for us!!  The job is not our source and praise God for that!!  So, if you don’t already do this, start to ask the Lord to help you renew your mind and change old mindsets of negative thinking.  It will change your life!