identity

Happy Valentine’s Day!

~ Patrice A London ~ 1 Comment

I just wanted to share some love notes from a class led by Francois Du Toit, author of The Mirror Bible translation. I hope you take the following thoughts to heart and know you are, have always been and will always be, deeply and immeasurably loved.

No one looks for something they’ve never lost possession of in the first place. You were always His. You can’t be lost if you did not belong to begin with.

My prayer for you today is that you would agree with God about you.

I pray that more than pleading with God to know His plan for your life, that you realize that your life is His plan.

I pray that you would rest beside the still waters and see yourself as He does. Your spirit remembers who you truly are.

I pray that you remember that whatever is true of Jesus is true of you too. As he is, so are we, in this world. (1 John 4:17)

Enjoy your day!

Love, Patrice

Who Do You Say I Am?

~ Patrice A London ~ 1 Comment

Recently, I drove along with my children, basically preaching to them about their identity in Christ.  We’d heard some things that were a bit off and I wanted to clear it up right quick and set them on a different path than what was proposed.

I believe this is a time where we who say we believe, really need to get to the business of believing God.  We know the Bible verses that say we are a royal priesthood. We boldly declare that we are more than conquerors; we are the head, not the tail; we are above only, never beneath.  We quote that we are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus.  We know these things by heart, but do we believe them?

I remember a song I heard growing up that I thought was kind of a cute play on words at the time.  The lyrics went, “I’m just a nobody, trying to tell everybody, about somebody who can save anybody.”  I couldn’t forget that song if I tried.  I also remember a song that started out with “I’m only human, I’m just a man…”  These songs are stupid.  They diminish our identity in a very crafty way and keep us from truly believing we are who God says we are.

Consider this, in John 14:12, Jesus said that we who believe will do what he did and greater.  How can one who sees themselves less than who God says they are, set themselves to do anything?  We are to heal the sick, raise the dead, cast out demons and more, but if we are running around, talking about how we’re only human, prone to mistakes, how can we do anything?  If we feel we are nothing, nobodies, etc, how do we take that mindset over to the sister or brother who is struggling with addiction and in need of a touch from God, and heal them?  Jesus didn’t say to pray for healing for others.  He instructed us to heal them. How does one heal anyone when they see themselves so low?

We must remedy this awful perception of ourselves.  It isn’t humble or cute or even true.  It’s religious nonsense that I believe comes straight from the pit of hell.  We need to spend time in God’s presence, asking Him to pour into us.  We need to allow His perception of us to become ours.  We need to see ourselves for who we truly are and move in that knowledge.  We need to get away from this pitiful, self deprecating way of seeing ourselves and others. It isn’t right and we won’t get anywhere with this mindset.

God is merciful in that He meets us right where we are, so I don’t pretend to speak for Him when I say that I am so tired of hearing people in church services and events, inviting Holy Spirit to come as if He left and needed someone to call Him back.  I am tired of hearing this pitiful, “More of you God, less of me!” cry.  I guarantee, He is very secure in who He is.  You are here beloved, because He wants you!  He thinks you are the bees knees and wants you here.  He doesn’t have any problem at all with you, your disposition or your idiosyncrasies.  He loves you, deeply.

Also, He never held back anything from us.  He literally gave us His all, and just to be sure, there is nothing left out of all.  He gave us everything, so why do we keep crying out for more of Him?  What part of Himself did He withhold from us?  Was it His right pointer finger that He held behind His back? My goodness!  Jesus said it is finished, yet we find so much to do in order to obtain this or that, not realizing that we are completely bypassing the finished work of Christ in favor of some thing we (the little old nobody human, prone to mistakes and folly) must do in order to fix things so that we can get something that God forgot or left out of the equation.  If this is the case, why did Jesus die?  Why did he say, “It is finished!”?  Did he lie?  Was there some little caveat that is in fine print that some have missed?

All that to say, get in His presence dear one.  Stay there.  Be ever and always aware of Him and allow Him to love on you and fill you with His truth, the truth, about you.  You are more powerful than you think.  You are more magnificent than you realize.  Let Him tell you and show you.  Allow Him to blow your mind and rid you completely of all the enemies lies about you.  You are not your family history, prone to this sickness, disease or that.  You are not merely human.  You are His, made in His image, His likeness.  Will you believe Him?  Ask Him, “Lord, who do You say I am?”.

Discipleship At Its Best

~ Patrice A London ~ Leave a comment

In Matthew 28:19, Jesus starts off by saying, “Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations…”  I am crying and filled with such an immense sense of joy as I type this because for once in my life, in a church setting no less, I can think of 3 beautiful men who are so dear to my heart who are doing just what Jesus said, for me.  These men, in no particular order include, Dennis Arroyo, Russ Painter and Gary Fishman.

These three prophet guys are so very special to me.  They have been my introduction into what Jesus modeled in leadership.  I can sit and just form a puddle of tears around myself thinking about them and what gifts they are to the Body of Christ and me in particular.  They have and continue to give me so much, even without always realizing it.  I really need to get it together, I can hardly see as I type at this point, I keep crying. 🙂

What I love is that none of these men claim, by any means, to know it all, to have perfect theology  or anything of the sort.  They are simply real, honest, pure and nothing short of astoundingly amazing men of God who truly have His heart for His creation.  They don’t try to be in or make spotlights or brands or names for themselves.  They push others to become what and who God has made them to be and they do it with love.  Russ gives you gentle but firm nudges.  Dennis is more than ready to step aside and pass a mic, and Gary, if there’s ever a bus you want to be thrown under, it’s one he’s a part of.  To say that I love them just feels so inadequate and minuscule, but I do, dearly love them all.

They are helping me to grow and learn and be more effective in the part of my walk with Christ that is to be in the “spotlight”.  I am more than happy to sit off to the side, in the background but it’s not the easiest thing to do when you have a gift to sing and speak.  One kind of has to be in the fore front for such things. 🙂 These guys help make that so much easier.

So, Lord, I declare lots of more over these beautiful men and their beautiful families.  More love, more joy, more peace, more strength, more growth, divine health, supernatural wealth, all above and beyond for them.  Go crazy, Abba, like only You can.  Lavish  them millions of times over with all that they selflessly give so many others.  And, let me see it happen, just so I can laugh, cry, and rejoice with them. Thank you so much Abba.  You are truly too much but at the same time, I can’t get enough of You!! ❤ ❤ ❤

Following Christ and Him Alone

~ Patrice A London ~ 2 Comments

I didn’t post anything last week because I was finding it a bit tough to make a whole lot of sense about what is going on inside of me these days.  Well actually, it makes perfect sense, it’s just, words escaped me and frankly, I was in no position to write coherently as I am almost always in a state of being ever so drunk on His love.

I have been feeling a bit differently  for several months now concerning some ideas and mindsets that I had about my Christian walk.  I couldn’t really put my finger on it initially but I just kept abiding in my Abba and as always, He has brought amazing clarity and revelation. Also, reading the book, The Mystical Union by John Crowder, speaking with a few friends who I consider no holds barred believers in the Word, and attending the Power and Love conference a few weeks ago just sealed the deal for me. I am forever changed.

I love how all I have to do is shift my thoughts to Him and boom, I am overtaken by Love Himself.

I love how I have but to focus on Him and allow Him to pour into me and He brings to light and fixes things I wasn’t even conscious of, let alone, looking to fix.  My focus is ever on Him.

I love the simplicity of His Word. In John 6:29 (NLT) it says, Jesus told them, “This is the only work God wants from you: Believe in the one he has sent.” 1 John 2:6 NLT says Those who say they live in God should live their lives as Jesus did.

I am finding that now, more than ever before, my focus is zoomed into Christ’s example.  If I am to be following His example, there are mindsets I have found that I need to let go of, mindsets that don’t exactly fit well with how He operated here on Earth.  I’m finding that the falling away of these old mindsets are producing an even greater sense of freedom in my life.  I truly feel like I am more than just a mere human being.  I’m not just here taking up space. I’m not locked into this constant struggle of I’m saved and going to Heaven but I have so many things I need to fix in order to receive all God has for me. I’m not striving or struggling to be who God created me to be, I am simply focused on Him and He is taking care of it all.

I am reading His word, not for information or to prove that I am correct (and someone else is wrong), but to know Him more intimately.  I am living in an ever growing state of revelation and awareness of who I am so that I can walk it out easily. I mean really, how hard is it to simply be who you are?  I am becoming love. I am believing in the One He sent and following Him and I am finding that His yoke is in fact easy, and His burden is light.  I am content to no longer allow my experiences or anything else I see, dictate where I place my trust/faith. My faith is in His finished work alone.  It is non-negotiable. I am choosing to follow Christ alone.

Freedom

~ Patrice A London ~ Leave a comment

One of the many ways God speaks to me is through my dreams.  It is one of my favorite ways because I have so little to do with it as far as control or messing it up.  He often tells me what He is doing or about to do through them.  He also warns me of what is soon to come through them as well and I just love it all.  Talk about Holy Intel!

One such dream went like this…  In the dream, I would look at the palm of my hands and then as I looked, I could see that the pads of my fingers were bruised. So, using the other hand, I would squeeze the pads of each of my fingers and thumbs one by one.  As I did this, lots of little needles, like the size of sewing needles, would protrude out and I would remove them.  I was happy to remove them, it was fun, even.  I did each of my fingers and thumbs until all the needles were removed.  Weird dream right?

I sent it to Gary Fishman, who interprets dreams.  Gary said that the needles represented words and negative things that people have said about or to me that have gotten under my skin and held me back in various ways. Removing them represents my gaining freedom in those areas.

Of course, this was amazing news to me but here’s what Gary didn’t know at that point.  Two people, an adult woman and an 11 year old girl, both prophesied over me recently that God was healing me in various ways, not just physically, but emotionally and other ways as well.  Then, I had that dream.  Also, something else happened.

One day, after I returned home from visiting family and friends in the DC area, I sat on my bed, looking at pictures of my son that my beautiful Debbie took and sent me.  14054219_10210243946161183_2369251474626678082_n

Here’s where God got all up in it.  I admired Debbie’s work first.  She is an amazing photographer, among many other things and my boy is a ham.  Then, I admired my son.  He’s quite adorable, right?  Then, God highlighted his complexion, but He didn’t stop there.  I looked at my son and saw the beautiful hues under his brown skin, the orange/yellowish highlights and before I could form a thought, God began to play a short movie in my mind.  There were various scenes from my childhood.  Being called names by classmates who didn’t deem me dark enough. A scene from my dark skinned cousin and I playing together and him shouting, “I’m the Black Avenger!”, after which, I yelled, “And I’m the Brown Hornet!”, then, out of nowhere, my dark skinned grandmother comes rushing into the room, got in my face and said, “No. You’re the brown nothing.  That’s what you are, a brown nothing!”  She left my cousin and I confused as we were way to young to comprehend what had happened.  Of course this didn’t stop me from letting my mom know that I was a brown nothing when I got home that day.

All that was a lot, but God wasn’t finished with my little movie.  Then I saw, countless times that others around me were deemed chocolate beauties, while I stood back watching it all.  I learned to appreciate dark skin.  I have always loved dark skinned people and could easily see their beauty where others couldn’t, but here’s what also happened.  When I looked at my hand or in the mirror, I didn’t look like them.  I wasn’t so “chocolate”.  So, I learned that they are gorgeous, beautiful people and me, well, not so much.  I just didn’t measure up.  Then God showed me a few more scenes.  One was of me and a dark skinned friend who I thought far more beautiful than me, holding hands, sitting on the floor, chanting, wishing to magically change and be each other’s complexion.  She was tired of being called black and I just wanted to be beautiful like her. I needed to be darker. Then, I saw the astonished look on my boyfriends face as my tiny grandmother practically dragged him into the house upon first laying eyes on him.  He was a beautiful chocolate boy, so immediately, he was approved.

So, God showed me all this, and then, He began to play scenes from times where I was complimented by friends and others about my complexion and I all but dismissed most of them because what I’d learned first, from the people most important to me, stuck.

Then, I saw myself just a few weeks ago, at a cookout.  It was said that there was a gorgeous chocolate little boy there.  When I saw him, I gasped, he was in fact gorgeous.  Then, still needing some sort of twisted approval, I made sure to mention that not only had I seen the boy, but I agreed that he was beautiful.  I got my nod of approval but when it didn’t feel good,  I dismissed it.  When God showed me that scene again, which occurred not even two weeks ago, I sat on my bed and cried.  I had let others issues with themselves affect and infect me to such a degree that I thought nothing of myself.  I thought nothing of the beautiful complexion He chose to give me, nothing at all.  I took on others’ issues as if they were my own and I owned those issues, unknowingly, for decades.

I repented and thanked God for newfound freedom.  I looked in the mirror and studied my beautiful skin and appreciated it like never before.  I’m right in the middle.  I’m not dark skinned and I’m not light skinned, but what I am is absolutely, perfectly beautiful.  I looked and looked for that gorgeous boy at the cookout when I had a gorgeous boy right there at the table with me- my son!

So, I’m done taking on issues that aren’t mine, and I am praying fervently for others with these color issues because really, it’s stupid.  I apologized to my brown husband for telling him that he’d better know that I married him for love, because he’s not dark enough. I have also apologized to my children and told them they no longer have to watch what they say about their complexions around certain people.  I am released from that bondage. Beauty comes in so many different shades and hues.  I am grateful to God that I am now free in this area.  I take to heart Galations 5:1 which says- “Stand firm therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, and don’t be entangled again with a yoke of bondage.”  I am free and will remain free.  Hallelujah!!!

For You Dear Reader, With Love

~ Patrice A London ~ Leave a comment

Last week, before I traveled to spend a few days with family and friends in DC and Maryland, I told the Lord that I wanted my next blog post to be centered around you.  I asked Him to give me ideas and thought naively that I would write this blog post while I was down there visiting.  Of course, that didn’t happen.  Here’s what has happened…  This morning, I looked at my Facebook newsfeed’s, “On This Day” section and saw the memories I made on this day, last year and years before, and I found the perfect thing for you!  It’s a prayer that I wrote.  Instead of just writing word for word though, I’m adding to it and changing it a bit, as I want to make it more of a declaration for you than a mere “wish list”. So, here it is, for you, with lots of love, my dear reader.

I speak peace and joy over you. No matter what is going on in your life and around you, may you always remember that you are never alone, never without options, fully surrounded, and deeply loved.  May every trial you face, push you further into the arms of your Father until the enemy refuses to waste any effort and/or resources targeting you.

I command healing over your body, from top to bottom.  His blood flows through your veins.  You are His family and because healing is the children’s bread, eat up and savor every morsel, dear one.  I decree that not only are you healed, but you are transitioning to walking in divine health because as a child of God, it is your right, your inheritance.  Jesus left no one sick.  His will is always that you be healed, so I declare that over you, in Jesus name.

I speak encounters with the Person of Love over you, knowing that perfect love casts out all fear and I pray that you would give the enemy nothing to agree with in your life, thereby giving him no room to enter in and run rampant.

I decree that all chains and strongholds over your life are broken and destroyed.  You are free.  You are free to be you without apology, fully being who you were called to be before the foundations of the earth.

I decree that your mind is being daily renewed in such a way that you don’t suffer from that old, ugly orphan spirit.  I decree that you walk in an ever increasing measure of revelation regarding who you are and Whose you are, so that you are free from being critical, bitter, depressed, worn down and out and lonely.  The truth is, you are loved with an everlasting love, fully surrounded and cherished, just for being.  There is nothing you can do to make God love or value you any more or less, so I declare that the religious spirit is not a part of your life, making you think you must do something in order to get something from the Lord.  Before you knew Him, He loved you, chose you, appointed and called you.  Before you were born, He died for you and gave you His all.  You did nothing to deserve or earn it, He did it because He loves you.

I declare that you are wise as a serpent but harmless as a dove.  You don’t easily fall for the enemy’s tricks to get your focus off God and onto yourself and your faults.  If your focus shifts to your faults and makes you feel like you are back to square one, “Just a sinner, saved by grace”,  I ask that Holy Spirit would pull you back from that religious way of thinking.  You are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus now, no longer a sinner, no longer a slave to sin.  Your focus is ever on your Father and His immense love for you.  No distractions.  When you focus on you in this way, you’re missing out on what God has for you and what you are to give others around you. This is self-centered, not at all as holy as it seems.  The Father does not want us beating each other or ourselves up over sin.  He doesn’t do this to us.  He paid for every single one of our sins long before we were born.  Focusing on your shortcomings does not help you to get better, as what you focus on is what will grow in your life.  Focus on the Father, confess all to Him and allow Him to change your focus. Be filled and stay filled with all that He has for you.

I declare that wisdom and understanding be your closest companions.  I ask that you become adept in stepping back, outside of yourself, when things happen.  That you would climb into your Heavenly Father’s lap and see from a higher perspective, what is truly going on and behind every situation you face.  I pray that you take to heart the fact that we wrestle not against flesh and blood.  I declare that you see with greater clarity than ever before and can have compassion and wisdom in every circumstance.  May your eyes be opened to the enemy at work so that you don’t fall for his tactics.  I speak a constant flow of Holy Intel over you, straight from Holy Spirit.  You won’t miss a thing.  You have the mind of Christ.

I declare that you are filled to overflowing with every good thing- so much that you can’t help but affect and infect others with the goodness of God.

I declare that you live, truly live, not just exist. You will not just reach your destiny, but you will enjoy the journey and help others do the same.

I declare a holy unrest over you that causes you to refuse to stay where you are forever, that you would be both content but also rise ever higher in life.

I declare all the best for you, as I want for myself. Let’s rise together. There’s no ceiling. There are no walls. If you have built any for yourself, my prayer is that you would break through them and be free.  I love you, dear reader.

Heaven’s Invasion

~ Patrice A London ~ Leave a comment

I deleted the post that I published yesterday.  I started that post a few days before but around 4am.  I couldn’t sleep, so I ended up erasing it all and writing something different, and publishing it from my phone.  The problem is, what you received was the incomplete first draft that I thought I’d erased. So here goes round two. 🙂

When I’d moved to NJ from DC, I was a staunch word of faith girl.  You couldn’t tell me anything. My goal was to pretty much find my church in DC, here in NJ, and live happily ever after.  Of course, that’s not at all how things went.  Over around 7 years or so, we went up and down NJ and NY, visiting churches.  Some, we stayed at for months, others, weeks and some, we visited once.  Although I didn’t realize I was prophetic, I knew God always told me definitively what church I was to join as a member.  He said nothing as we visited these churches, but I tried to make a few of the churches work.  Eventually, I saw how silly it all was and just gave up.  We stayed home and worshiped and studied the Bible and attended whatever church related events we were invited to.  We were believers without a home base.  At first I was upset about it but after a while, I began to hear from God more regularly, for myself.

I began to realize that I didn’t need someone to tell me what God was saying for me, I could hear from Him myself.  As I read the Bible, things that I had seen so many times before, jumped off the pages at me as something totally new and different.  It was amazing.

Then, I began to miss what I had growing up in church, community.  I felt confident that I could hear from God for myself and others, still not realizing that was prophecy, lol, but I missed people.  I love people.  So, after visiting The Holy Land experience in Orlando, FL, I began to ask God for the community I longed for.

Here’s the thing, God is a total show off.  To say that He gave me more than I bargained for is a gross understatement.  In this moment, I have to chuckle and admit, that He never did give me the church I wanted.  He did so much more.  He gave me Heaven’s Invasion. Heaven’s Invasion is nothing like any church I have ever seen or heard about, other than the first century one in the Bible.  In fact, it isn’t a church. It’s not a business at all.  It’s a regional gathering of believers.  It’s a place where Holy Spirit is Boss.  Where our pastor who we simply call Russ, is famous for saying that he isn’t in charge and asks, “What’s God saying?”

The mic is always open, it is never policed, and because we can all hear from God, people coming up to share what they see, hear, or sense, is a regular occurrence.  There are flags and dancing. The worship is literally intoxicating.  Angelic visitations as well as our resident angels fill the place every Sunday.  Prophecy and healing and miracles flow freely there.  In fact, when you come for the first time, you are bombarded with prophetic words from God that leave you feeling so loved and important to us and to God, because the truth is, you are.

Heaven’s Invasion is a very different place.  Firstly, we meet Sunday nights at 6pm.  Then, instead of starting with praise and worship, we start with the preaching/teaching, saving the best part for last.  No two Sundays are ever the same there.  One of my favorite things is that although we are a group of prophets, evangelists, teachers, pastors and apostles, you won’t hear anyone putting their function in front of their name.  It just doesn’t matter.  Everyone understands that those offices are simply functions.  Just as my husband doesn’t go by Air Traffic Controller Jermaine, there is an understanding that you simply do the job, there is no need for a title.  Jesus never stressed the importance of titles.  Because everyone is shedding old mindsets that are a result of the orphan spirit, we all agree that our favorite title/position is that of sons and daughters.  That is what Jesus modeled.

The best part of Heaven’s Invasion though, is the love.  My friend said, “Heaven’s Invasion is not a church, it is a family.”  She also said that she and her husband were really impacted by the obvious love that abounds there.  This is a place where there are no cliques, no hierarchy, no made up “office of the elder” (I mentioned the five fold offices above, better yet, see Ephesians 4:11), it’s just sons and daughters coming together and man… It is beautiful. I have never been to a place like this before.  Never imagined it could exist, but it does. We all chat daily, we go out to eat together, this weekend, there was even a sleepover! Together, we are doing what Jesus did and called us to do.  Just today, we received a video message from a guy who had Leukemia.  We have prayed with and for him, some of us visited him in the hospital.  We commanded sickness to leave his body and today, he sent us a video saying that the doctors can find no cancer in his blood any longer. Hallelujah!!!

I am so overjoyed to be a part of this family.  The people here are truly my family in every sense of the word.  My prayer is that more gatherings that truly exemplify the heart and nature of Jesus become more popular than the more common modern day pharisee movement we see happening.  I would love to see the places that hold such great significance in seating arrangements, costumes, titles and degrees, fade away.  I would love to see the bride of Christ arise, shed this orphan spirit that permeates so many facets of the Church, and be content with being sons and daughters, knowing that this is the best position ever and is without a doubt, more than enough.

 

 

There is No Hopelessness in Christ

~ Patrice A London ~ 1 Comment

For the past two days, I have felt so angry.  As I type this, it is Friday, July 8.  I don’t think I have ever started and deleted so many status updates on Facebook.  My newsfeed is filled with fear, helplessness, hopelessness, hatred, (justified) anger and depression.

Yesterday I posted the following status update:

“If only Christians understood the authority we have in Him… So many things that happen, just wouldn’t. If you believe you are hopeless and helpless, you are. As a man thinks in his heart, so is he (Proverbs 23:7). We have a real enemy, yes, but our enemy has been defeated. He is a thief, he has ability just as any thief does, but we have authority. We can bind the very will of God to any situation and see it come to pass. Problem is, so many don’t even have a clue what God’s will is to begin with. When will the Earth be able to stop groaning, waiting for God’s children to stand up, know who they are, and do what they are called to do? I’m so tired of the pleading and begging and wishing and hoping this will work type of thinking. “Oh God!!! Please heal, help, save, blah, blah, blah.”
YOU DO IT, “believer”!!! John 14:12-14 12 “I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done, and even greater works, because I am going to be with the Father. 13 You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father. 14 Yes, ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it!”

Today, I posted the following:

“You have heard it said that as a believer, that same power that raised Jesus from the dead lives inside of you. Do you really believe that? How is it that you are helpless, hopeless, depressed, running scared and without any options at all when He lives inside of you? The hope of glory dwells within you!!

There are some warriors about to rise up. Believing believers who won’t allow the enemy’s tactics to move or shake them into a state of panic or fear. Believing believers who will state the truth because there is a definitive Truth and His name is Yeshua. Dead will be raised, demons will be cast out and the sick will be healed. Where are those believers?”

Truly, what is in a person comes out in times like these.  When one is pressed on all sides, backed up against a wall, that is when you really get to see who they are, what they believe and are made of.

People talk about us being in a war and fighting a battle.  On one hand I get it, but, at the same time I wonder why a Christian believes themselves to be warring.  I thought Jesus said, “It is finished!” because it was in fact and entirely, finished.  He did it all, he won it all, gave us all and that’s that.

One of my friends once asked, “Then why am I going through all this stuff?”  With love, I replied, “Because you are allowing it.”  Sometimes, I think we much prefer staying in a state of victimization.  We prefer situations being someone else’s fault, in someone else’s control or doing so that it is all out of our hands.  We get to feel hopeless, helpless, victimized and do absolutely nothing but whine, cry, complain and mope.  This is not what Christians are called to.

I think it is well past time that we shed this orphan spirit mentality and really take hold of our identity in Him. We need to show the world what the children of God can do.  We can’t afford to waste any more time.

Here’s what I told someone I love: I think I have shared this with you but if not, just take some time and sit still and just focus on Him. Tell Him what you are feeling and going through. Lay it all out there, He knows anyway. Ask Him to give you something in exchange for those awful feelings and wait. Soak Him in and enjoy.

 

How Do You Esteem Others?

~ Patrice A London ~ 1 Comment

The anniversary of the death of the guy who raped me when I was 14, recently passed.  It did not pass without my noticing it.  I can’t say that it made me feel anything at all.  Not happy, but neither was I sad about it. Rather, I felt kind of pensive for a moment, re- read and shared a blog post I had written about him with a few people, but otherwise, I went on about my day.

Weeks later, I found myself scrolling down my newsfeed on Facebook and decided to look at a mutual friends wall, to see if anything was written about him on that date.

Here’s the weirdness in this…  I am not normally a nosy type.  I am not one who feels the need to be in the know about things, I really don’t care to.  I much prefer keeping to myself.  This time though, I felt led to search.

My feelings towards the guy who raped me are peculiar too. I loved him.  He was my friend, but that all changed with one bad decision-mine and his.  I decided to have friends over in my mother’s absence, against her wishes and he took that opportunity to rape me.  In the end, here’s how I feel about what happened: He had some things going horribly wrong inside of him. The act of raping me was more about that inner mess in him than it was about me.  I was just there and unfortunately came face to face with his inner turmoil.  If it wasn’t me, it would have been another.

Anyway, I looked at the mutual friends’ page and saw that a video had been posted where they took turns speaking about him.  They honored him.  I watched.  After I finished watching, I noticed a few things, big things…  Not only had I watched the entire video, I did not have a scowl or frown, nor did I feel angry or bitter or upset in the slightest.  By the end of the video, I was smiling! They all had such good things to say about him, and, barring the transgression he committed against me, they described the guy that I loved dearly.  A good guy.  A guy who was protective, kind and caring. A guy who was fun to hang out with.  Someone to know.  Someone to love and be loved by. An invaluable human being.  It felt good.

Skip to this morning…  As I spent time with the Lord, I ended up reading Philippians 2.  When I got to Philippeans 2:3, I stopped for a moment.

“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself”

“Let each esteem others better than himself”…  I stopped to think about how I treat others.  Admittedly, I am one of those people who loves people so it’s not as hard for me as it is for some to treat people well, complete strangers included.  I love surprising people with kindness.  My mind wandered though, to the harder to love types.  The people who are mean, vindictive, hateful to the core.  The ones who make you want to lay hands, steel toe boots, fists and chair upside their heads.

I asked the Lord, how on Earth was I to esteem such a person as better than myself.  He answered in pictures and words.  He played what I can only call a video, in my mind of exactly how to deal with one person who is being difficult should the need arise.  It was beautiful, I hope I have the opportunity to minister to that individual.  As the video played, He said that when people ‘act a fool’, they are not behaving in a manner that is consistent with who He created them to be, they are, in that moment, not being who they really are.  Haven’t we all had those days?

I asked Him to give me eyes to see (and ears to hear) people as they have been created to be and to be able to treat them as such, not as their behavior indicates or warrants.  Now, I’m not saying I’ll be stupid, so let’s get that out on the table.  There are people who need to be forgiven from afar.  There are people who it’s best to love from afar, lest they cause physical, emotional or spiritual harm to others.  I just want to make sure I am doing my part in loving God’s creation.  How someone else behaves, has nothing to do with my reaction or response.  I get to choose that part.  Hallelujah!!!  People like to think they have no control.  They don’t want to take responsibility for their behavior. They say a person made them mad or act ugly or whatever.  I won’t be anyone’s puppet in that manner any longer.  I have a choice.  So do you.

Another thing to consider is our faulty hierarchy of sin.  Rape warrants death or close to it, while lying warrants a slap on the wrist.  What’s the difference really?  Is it not all under the category of sin?  Is it not all wrong and punishable?  One thing that saddens me is how soon we can forget our own transgressions and latch on to someone else’s, ready to crucify them when truly, we did something very similar, or perhaps the same or “worse”, once upon a time.  Oh, the stories I could but won’t share in order to protect the not so innocent!

Anyway, my prayer is that we all remember that all have sinned, not just they or them, all, including me, including you.  We can’t control how others behave, but we can control ourselves.  Let’s work on loving others into who they truly are in Christ.  Let’s find out who we are in Christ, gain freedom and help set others free! Let’s allow our Heavenly Father to tell us who we really are and what we are here to accomplish. He’s the One who created us and has all the answers right? Let’s ask Him! Who’s your Daddy? 😉